We went to the movies recently for the first time in 2011. Seriously. Put $1,000 on the table and I still couldn't tell you the last movie I saw in the theater.
There was a trailer (is that what they're still called?) for the new Smurfs movie. Apparently, there is this new thing called Real 3D, which is somehow cooler than regular 3D, which I didn't even know that you could watch movies in. I'm cool, I swear. My toddler said so.
At any rate, I was interested to see what Smurfette was going to look like. She was my favorite Smurf- though really, was there much competition? The only other one I could still name is Papa Smurf, and I never really understood why he was decked out in red Scarlet Letter style.
Here she is folks. And to make it even better, she will be voiced by...wait for it... Katy Perry.
She looks like the love child of a Smurf and a Bratz doll. I'm afraid a heavy breath from Gargamel would flip that skirt up in a nano second and reveal some underwear- and by the looks of her high heels, I'm guessing they wouldn't be granny panties. Her hair is too Paris Hilton, and that pose makes me think she was just cat-called by a group of construction Smurfs and her response was, "Who, ME? (Inappropriate hooker giggle)"
So here's my thought. If I were the only woman in a village full of men, you can bet your sweet cheeks I wouldn't be in a dress every day. In fact, I'd probably have a closet full of pajamas- and not the cute ones you wear when you're first married. I'd wear nothing but Rainbows (black ones for nice occasions) and I sure as sugar wouldn't be blowdrying my hair.
So kudos to you Smurfette for accessorizing and coiffing and killing your feet. But I can guarantee that I won't be seeing your outfits in Real 3D anytime soon. Harry Potter is calling, and even though Hermoine is hot, she doesn't look like she needs her own street corner.
3 comments:
I love this, so true! I read it out loud to my husband and he was LOLing. Nicely done Braunalisious, nicely done :)
You are such a crack up! I love reading your posts, they are so witty and still down to earth, just like you! That is why I love you so much!
lol! So true :)
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