You know how I can tell that I was right after an argument? My husband wakes up and starts cleaning.
We don't argue very often, but when we do its usually in the evening. Anyway, I can count on one hand in the year and a half that we've been married that we've had spats that have lasted beyond one evening. And I am not a member of the "don't go to be angry" club. For example...
A few nights ago Nick hurt my feelings. Not intentionally, just doing a dumb boy thing that made me feel unimportant. Note- this involved his complete and utter fascination with Olympic soccer and his unwillingness to turn off the TV to spend some time with me. Simple, yet I was craving a little bit of adult time, and was in no mood to be cast aside for television soccer. ESPECIALLY since it was DVR'd and could have easily been resumed later. If you can't tell already, I thought I was 100% in the right and was apalled that he would turn away time with me for tv. However, this is not the point.
I'm discovering in my old age to simply say how I feel about things, rather than be upset and make Nick guess, which inevitably lead to me being upset about the original hurt, PLUS the fact that he couldn't guess why I was upset. Stupid waste of my time and energy. I also discovered that if I tell him what's going on with me, chances that it'll be corrected and that I'll get what I want increase dramatically.
So I said, "You hurt my feelings." He apologized, and went on to defend his choice which absolutely infuriated me. I'm pretty sure by the way I reacted that I was too tired to spend quality time with him anyway, but at this point I was running on querulous fumes. After a few more exchanges, I decided I'd had enough and politely (hehe) excused myself for bed.
I fell asleep after a few tears (hormones still raging from the birth, I'm sure) and replaying the event in my head a few thousand times.
I woke up in the morning to the baby wiggling her way out of her swaddle, and took her in the other room to feed her. An hour or so later, I heard Nick rise. The first sounds I heard were the distinct noises of the plastic sliding drawers that are masquerading in our closet as a dresser. He's putting his clothes away.
Next, he exited the bedroom, took out the trash, washed the dishes, loaded the dishwasher collected the recycle, and put away his computer. He did this silently and without making eye contact, which if you know how small our place is you'd be even more amazed. Once he was finished, he came to me on the couch as I was burping the baby, looked me in the eye, and said, "Can I take her? You said you'd like to go on a walk." And that was it.
A little later we hashed out the rest of what needed to be said. It was calm and thoughtful and we were both in a good place. Shoot, I was near ecstatic- I got to go on a walk by myself and the house was clean! He could've said nearly anything at that point.
All this to say that I love my little husband, who warps into Mr. Clean to apologize. Do you think it'd be in poor taste to start a fight next time I don't feel like cleaning the toilet?!? J/K!
I'm watching the closing ceremonies of the 2008 Beijing Olympics right now (on DVR, thank goodness- fast forwarding is my best friend). This is Cirque de Soleil on Asian crack, which is the best kind. It is incredible- Nick and I both want one of the circle wheely bikes.
I LOVE the Olympics. I love the spirit of the games, people coming together to represent their home country, the stories behind the athletes- all of it. As with all good things comes the opportunity for hilarious and ridiculous things. For example...
*Race Walking as an Olympic sport. I can almost guarantee that every one of those people are going to grow up and have hip displaysia. These people are WALKING 6 minute miles. I can barely do 1 lap around the track in 6 minutes. And how do you figure out that your life calling is Olympic race walking?
*Rhythmic gymnasts truly are dancers that have gone retarded.
*Shawn Johnson is a legal midget. She's adorable and talented, but she's 4'9" and 90 lbs. Honestly.
*Bob Costas is a total smart aleck and I loved every minute. Favorite Bob Costas quote came after the whole Nastia Luikin tie in uneven bars debacle, when the announcers were beyond upset over the way the gold medalist was chosen and wouldn't stop complaining about how unfair it was. The next event they showed was the men's vault, where there was also a tie between two gymnasts from other countries, and the announcers barely mentioned it. Bob Costas, "Well, I guess the tiebreaker makes more sense when it doesn't involve an American." Okay, I'm paraphrasing. But that was the jist and I love the sarcasm. Plus, isn't he cute?
*Dressage is inane. Nick says, and I agree, that people shouldn't be given medals when the horse is the athlete.
*I just heard that the Chinese spent 40 billion dollars on the Olympics. Outrageous. How about next time, they spend a more reasonable amount like, hmm, 30 billion dollars and use the other 10 billion to, I don't know, FEED HUNGRY PEOPLE? Seriously. On the other hand, the buildings that they built, especially the Bird's Nest and the Water Cube, are gorgeous.
There are so many more things that I loved and laughed at and made me tear up. Thank you to the incredible athletes, especially those who gave of themselves and worked their butts off to represent the USA. Until Vancouver, I love you Olympics.
Remember when I was going to post more often? Yeah, me too. Hey, give me a break- I have a two month old.
Holy crap, I have a two month old! And I totally missed the obligatory month-by-month birthday post. I'm a bad blogger mom.
Well, here's a picture of the little cutie. Yours to enjoy.
It's been a busy week in the life o' the Brauns, full of lunches with friends, naps, fun birthday parties (Happy 3rd Micah!), trips to Target and the like. Scintillating, I know.
The week of business culminating yesterday with a trip to the doctor for both of us. The A-girl is a stud muffin- now weighing in at 13.9 lbs and stretching out to 24.25 inches. Oh, and her head size, for those of you who are keeping tally, is 17" around (Thanks to her daddy!). She's in the 97% all around, so Nick keeps trying to decide what Olympic sport she's going to compete in. The way she's growing, she would be a fantastic shot putter. I'm pulling for soccer player. More on my take on the Olympics in a later post...
Hardest part of the A-girl's appointment was that she started her vaccinations. I was really torn leading up to the whole thing as to whether we were going to go through with them or not. There's so much literature and information about vaccinations now, from Jenny McCarthy's single-handed abhorrence to the practice, to Amanda Peet recently calling parents who don't vaccinate their children, "parasites." It's much easier to agree with the Jenny McCarthy school of "don't-vaccinate-just-INCASE-there's-an-issue" thought- plus, what parent is excited to subject their child to sharp needles and dead strains of toxic diseases? Nick and I had an honest discussion with the doctor, and after carefully weighing the decision decided to have her vaccinated according to the AAP schedule. It was a tough decision, and with all the controversy out there, I feel like I have to defend going full-steam ahead. **PLEASE NOTE- This is not to persuade or dissuade anyone from their own decision about vaccinating their children. This is just me, sharing my decision as a new mom.** #1- Not wanting to vaccinate her was really more for me than it was for her. #2- I was vaccinated on time and on schedule and I'm still alive and well. #3- If we decided to go on a delayed schedule (ie- doing fewer shots at a time and going to the doctor every month to keep up-to-date) we would have to schedule a full appointment as our pediatrician doesn't do shot-only appointments. #4- (And this is the biggest reason) The A-girl is going to have to be in some kind of day care when I go back to work, and I want her to be as safe as possible from the inevitable germs that come with gaggles of children.
So Nick held her and the evil nurse came in with a tray-full of needles. The nurse was like 12 years old and I will NEVER like her, simply because SHE was the one to cause the A-girl this pain. Three quick shots covered with Tweety bandages later, and the A-girl was screaming and clinging to her mama. We both lived. And she has been perfectly fine- no fever or soreness or extra crankiness, just three tiny reddish bumps on her chunky thighs where the needles went in.
My doctor appointment was a whole other party- I'll spare you the details (and you're so very welcome, btw) but safe to say that I have fully recovered from the c-section. Crap. That means no more "taking it easy" or excuses as to why I'm not working out and have been eating like a still 9-month pregnant woman. So today, I ate a salad and took a walk. Never mind the spoon full of frosting I had to wash down the salad. Baby steps, my friends, baby steps. I'm going to be nice to my body and know that after carrying a 9 1/2 lb fetus for 41 weeks, things are just not going to be the same. For those of you who have know me 5+ years, you remember my, shall we say, larger days. The most frustrating thing for me right now is that I'm just 5 lbs under what I was when I started Weight Watchers that first time. So I feel like I'm starting at the beginning again and that makes me tired. The good news is that I've done this before, and I know exactly what's required of me to make it happen. So, stay tuned for pictures of my soon-to-be evolving figure.
And now, a small tribute to the man that I love who makes me laugh constantly. The other day, Nick is on the phone standing in the kitchen, and I notice he's playing with something. He looks up and sees me watching him, and gives me the following poses...
Yes, that's right. That's my husband playing Buzz Lightyear with the breast shields that go to my breast pump. I thought I was going to die laughing. Pumping will never be the same. Thanks honey. I love you.
Alright, off to rock the baby girl to sleep. Sweet dreams to all!
Friday night we watched School of Rock at Nick's mock drive-in movie at church with the youth group kids. The youth group girls lovingly passed the A-girl around- we'll never be short of babysitters!
A wave of nostalgia brought me back to the drive-in at the OC Fairgrounds with my family when I was younger. I have vivid memories of the preparation; we'd go to the store to each pick out one candy, pop popcorn at home and we'd each get our own tupperware full to chow down on during the movie, piling blankets in the back of the blue Dodge Caravan with the wood siding to create a tent/bed/cave of wonders in the back once the bench seat was taken out. We'd pile in the van, drive to Orange, park, and Dad would attach the huge silver speaker to the driver's side window. Inevitably, at least two of the four of us would be asleep halfway through the first movie. Looking back, my parents probably couldn't have been less interested in the movie itself, but were eternally grateful for a few hours of quiet and an opportunity to hold hands and be together.
Back to the weekend... Saturday was a big day for the A-girl- she was baptized!!! We had a private baptism in Nick's parents backyard with their Bishop friend from Africa. We were surrounded by our amazing friends and family as the baby girl celebrated her first sacrament. She was an absolute angel and didn't even cry when the Bishop doused her- she was so wet that her eyelashes were sticking to her cheeks. And for the rest of the weekend, she smelled ever so slightly of chrism oil. And check out the baptism cake below- its ridiculous and awesome. I have been so blessed in the last two years to have a few large parties/showers- college graduation, wedding shower, wedding, baby shower, and now the A-girl's baptism. I'm always overhwelmed at how many awesome friends and family members we have. Thank you and we love you.
We rounded out Saturday with dinner with the whole family at Claim Jumper to celebrate my birthday. Something else people should tell you when you have a baby- your birthday is SO not about you anymore! It was a very relaxing birthday, woke up to a smiling A-girl, spent the morning at my mom's, lunch with Nick and the A-girl, made dinner (chicken taco salad- YUM!) and waited for mom and dad to get home from Vegas to have cake. Here's a picture of the adorable and yummy cake Nick made for me. He dyed all the frosting himself and surprised me with the cake, and his incredible thoughtfulness.
Sunday was the A-girl's first Angel game!!! Her daddy could not have been more proud and made sure she was rested before the game.
She donned her "My First Angels Tee" and beanie and trooped off to the Cox Suite to enjoy the game. It was fantastic with a bottom of the 9th win by the Angels. Picture of us at the game to come- my camera decided to stop working correctly.
Way for fun family weekends!
The A-girl being baptized- with Katie and Mike, her godparents
The awesome baptism cake. We decided the dad looked like James Bond and the mom looked like a cross between Laura Ingalls Wilder and Scarlett O'Hara. Hilarious!
My birthday cake from my adorable husband. Kinda looks like Winnie the Pooh has on a big black Speedo. I love it.
The A-girl in her Angels gear- the socks really complete the look.
I recently devoured Emily Giffin's novel "Baby Proof." Summary- a couple falls in love and gets married KNOWING that neither of them wants to have kids. Then, about two years into the marriage, the husband changes his mind and wants a baby. The wife is a high-powered executive and doesn't want kids interrupting her career or the fun, spontaneous life she and her husband have. I'll stop there in case anyone would like to read the book and see how it pans out.
I really enjoyed reading the book- I finished all 300+ pages in 12 hours. It got me thinking about babies and lifestyles.
Before Nick and I were married, we went on an Engaged Encounter through the Catholic Church. To be honest, I didn't really think we needed to go since we'd been together for 9 years already, but it was a fun excuse to spend a weekend at a mission in San Diego together. It turned out to be wonderful- something I will forever highly recommend to engaged couples. During the weekend, we would hear a talk on a subject (ie- Finances). Then we would spend alone time journaling on a few prompts about said subject before rejoining with our significant other to read what we'd each written and discuss.
When the "Family Planning" talk arrived, I knew we would be on the same page about wanting kids eventually. Marrying at 25 and 27 respectively gave us the freedom to choose to wait a few years before starting a family, or so we thought. I clearly remember Nick saying to me, "I want to wait at least two years before we start talking about having kids."
Needless to say, when I saw the two blue lines appear on the pregnancy test not even 6 months after our wedding day, Nick's comment from Engaged Encounter was the first thing to flash through my mind. This was not the plan. What were we going to do? Where would we live? What would he say when I told him I was pregnant?
If there was ever a moment thus far when I knew that this man was meant to be my husband, it was when I said, "I have something to tell you," and walked to the bathroom to unearth the positive pregnancy test I'd been hiding. Handing it to him without a word, I watched carefully for his honest reaction, excpecting to see a flash of shock and disappointment. Instead, he looked deep into my eyes and said, "Are you okay?" with the most concern I've yet to hear in his voice. I burst into tears.
All this to say that we thought our marriage was Baby Proof for at least a few years. We had grand visions of taking a Mediterranean cruise for our two year anniversary. We were going to look into missionary work together in South America so Nick could brush up on his Spanish and we could teach and see the world. We also had simple visions of Saturday morning sleep ins and spontaneous movie dates and romantic evenings to make up for all the years we waited to be together.
Not that we've abandoned our visions, the simple or grand, but that those visions have now changed. From the moment Nick looked at the two blue lines, we were different. It was as if we'd been leisurely cruising down the road of life on PCH and then we were suddenly on the 5 going 80. And I think that knowledge was the driving force behind his two-year comment.
So reading this book with each and every reason the wife gave her husband for not wanting to have kids, I saw the young, fun couple we were this time a year ago slipping away. We're now responsible for the health and well being of another human being, one who needs us for everything, one who comes before our own wants and needs.
Okay, I'm going to have to ruin the book a little bit. Toward the end, after the couple has divorced and gone their seperate ways and the wife dated, she realizes that the husband was her soul mate and that if being together means having a baby, then she'll do it. Her "willingness" to give in and have a child is very different from the early surprise that Nick and I have.
It reminded me of what he told me one night, "It's something we always knew we wanted, we just didn't know we wanted it so soon."
Weigh in on being Baby Proof, and the difference between choosing not to have kids and choosing WHEN to have kids. Oh, and read the book if you need a fun, easy read for a lazy afternoon. Don't we all wish we had more of those :)
Not quite as inappropriate when its on a baby's onesie and accompanied by a pacifier.
It's been a while since my last uplifting post- sorry to all my DEVOTED blog readers- all three of you. I've been attempting to post some video of the A-girl, but haven't quite mastered the skill yet.
Life is good as a professional woman of leisure. I've spent countless hours caring for and staring at my beautiful daughter, which is the whole point of having this time off work. I've yet to really start taking great care of myself yet, but I still feel like I haven't FULLY recovered from the c-section. So I'm trying to give myself a break and know that in the next few weeks the motivation I'm starting to feel again will eventually pay dividends.
I've also begun a list of blog topics to begin expounding on over the next few weeks. I think people read blogs for a few reaons: 1. You love me and are interested in what's up with my family, 2. You knew me long ago and want to know what's happened in my life (like an online high school reunion), 3. You know me peripherally through friends, 4. You enjoy blog stalking (more on that later), 5. I'm lame and it makes you feel better about your life or my favorite reason, 6. You think my daughter is adorable and I'm unnaturally witty. So whatever your reason for reading my blog, if I know you or not, I've decided to practice full disclosure on a multitude of topics and see how it goes. Perhaps this will be the start of my future career as a novelist or column writer.
So prepare yourselves friends. Here comes TMI.
For those of you who come to catch up with the A-girl and are tired of hearing about me, she is doing wonderful and has started to smile big HUGE smiles and coo and be awake outside of just wanting to eat. It's making this enjoyable experience that much more rewarding.
And here's a picture of the queen of adorableness...
Get Carried Away with Carrie! Mom to two, I try to balance a marriage, career, a fiendish workout regimen and Paleo diet. I model life around the belief that "People will often forget what you said and what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel." -Maya Angelou Read more about me here. Let's get-carried-away!
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